Dear Devil’s Advocate, 

Dear Devil’s Advocate,

I’m excited for a new year and all that comes with it, but keeping up with my New Year’s resolutions stresses me out. Every year, I make a list of goals, but fail to check off any. Do you have tips for accomplishing my goals by the end of the year?

Sincerely,

Blank-Listed Blue Devil

Dear Blank-Listed Blue Devil,

With new opportunities come new stress. I know that the beginning of the year can feel like you have to refresh your life or rebrand yourself, but you aren’t a company needing to sell a new winter clothing line: you can enter the new year however you please.

If you are interested in giving yourself some fun goals or self-help resolutions, I’m here to give you a guide to creating them in a way that is achievable and confidence-boosting.

First, I think it’s important to break down why many people often struggle to actually commit to their goals as soon as the second week of January comes around. In a CNBC article, neurologist Anne-Laure Le Cunff, PhD, explained that we’re obsessed with resolutions because they give us a sense of control and “the illusion of certainty”. “They make us feel like we’re in control, because we think that if we have a clear vision and a clear plan, and we execute on that plan, then we’re going to be successful,” she shared. When people make New Year’s resolutions, they often expect there to be immediate positive effects. So, our standards are set high, and as a Forbes article says, “it’s unlikely to succeed unless [you] address any potential underlying patterns and mindsets that might contribute.”

Now, once you understand where people go wrong, you can begin to fix the way you think about New Year’s resolutions. One such solution might be to begin keeping better track of your new goals. For me, these goals are more self-oriented, so I like keeping them in their own journal. But each person is different, so maybe you can use an app or write it down in your Notes app. Or, if these aren’t your style, telling someone else your goals is helpful; that way, they can hold you accountable in real time, or casually check in with you about them.

Once you’ve decided what form of organization works for you, it’s crucial that you figure out what types of goals you want. I know that this year, my goals center around leaning into certain aspects of myself or my life, for example, being more extroverted. I believe categorizing your goals into things like emotional, relationship, academic, exercise, etc. also helps you spend more time on the things you actually want to accomplish.

Referring back to letting ourselves down by making huge resolutions, I think it’s important to put effort into making smaller steps that build up to your goal. Instead of saying you want to run three miles every weekend, write that you hope to work your way up to running three miles and start with half a mile if you aren’t used to running.

A piece by Colorado State University recommends using a method called “SMART” goal planning, which stands for “specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-bound.” By checking that all your resolutions are aligned with a majority of these criteria, you will more likely end up with accomplishments that you feel proud of.

One way we can turn resolutions into something enjoyable is by collaborating with a friend. I know that in the past, I’ve done better with goals that require me to be held accountable. For example, a productive goal that fits this criteria would be studying with your friend at a new cafe once a month.

On the other hand, sometimes committing to a resolution and telling your friends and family can become a harder thing to accomplish. If you want to avoid people calling you out on not sticking to something, it is also valuable to keep some goals just for yourself. A goal doesn’t have to be something that you and others measure your success on; it can be something that you hope you do more of, such as talking to new people.

The most important thing that should apply to your resolutions is you. A list of resolutions should be things that bring you joy to think about in regard to the end result. It shouldn’t be something that is just a trend and not something you don’t enjoy, or that won’t benefit you. New Year’s can often be a time where everyone competes for who has embodied their vision board the best, but resolutions are ultimately a moment to reflect on what you want to do to improve your quality of life.

Sincerely,

The Devil’s Advocate